Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Impossible.

Ugh.

As most people who are close to me know, in the last few years my back has exploded and causes me an unnecessary amount of grief. I don't really know why and seemingly no one else does either. I've been to doctors, had blood tested, had chiropractic work done, acupuncture, IMS (Intramuscular Stimulation), laser treatment, had physiotherapy, used and ATM-2 treatment machine, massage therapy, and the list goes on.

It has got to the point where I can no longer do physical activity. Well I can do physical activity but basically the headache and pain that follows makes it simply not worth it. I've had to swear to myself to stop working out because as much as I want to do it I know it isn't worth it.

Although this has been very frustrating I have been able to deal with it because I still play soccer, do some other things occasionally. Unfortunately sports has been such a part of my youth and something I love to do. It is hard to no longer feel strong or feel like I could swim forever, or run a long ways if I wanted to. This really hit me today when I was working at the pool. I had to pull the 50m lane lines which are pretty heavy and I could tell my arms were way out of shape for it. It is sad because I loved pushing myself to lift more weights or bike further to know that I felt strong and now I have to keep telling myself not to do something I enjoy doing and I have no way to make it happen. Stupid. stupid.

On the bright side, doing nothing means I am way less hungry which means that I have much smaller grocery bills and I'm okay with that.

1 comment:

  1. I'm sorry for my DNA. Walking doesn't make me sore, like in Europe. Maybe the air will be better there.

    ReplyDelete